'Orrible trauma...

Is it safe? Is it safe?

I just had a tooth yanked out by the dentist, and I'm being a total wimp about it!

I was nearly crying when I arrived at the surgery this morning. But I went, so I suppose I could have taken the even more cowardly way out and hidden under the bed until I'd missed my appointment.

She must've pumped about a pint of anaesthetic into my jaw, then there was all kinds of stuff - poking, pressing, drilling. It's so barbaric, dentistry.

I kept my eyes closed most of the time, but I was unlucky enough to sneak a peek when she was just being handed the pliers. Pliers!!

The worst bit is that I've been looking on the internet about it. I figured that ignorance and fear went hand in hand, but I was wrong. Ignorance was bliss. Bliss, I tell you!

If I took all the advice I'd been given on the internet... Well, actually, I couldn't. I should eat nothing, and I should eat plenty. I should rinse my mouth with salt water, and I should never rinse my mouth at all. I should have a nice lie down, and I should under no circumstances lie down.

I've never seen so many bits of advice, many of which were conflicting.

The most amusing was that I'm not allowed to suck or blow for the next 48 hours. I have to go back to work in a few minutes - lucky I'm not a glass blower, balloon-animal maker, or prostitute!!

I need pain killers now. I don't want to know that there's a big hole in my jaw, and as the anaesthetic wears off, it's becoming harder and harder to deny!

Let's face it...

I'm worried now, that I might be facing up to too much.

I never get drunk, and I don't take any drugs. So everything is faced with a clear head.

Is that the best way, or just the stupid way?

Would I be better taking a little time off the relentless facing of my fears and worries and the harsh realities of life? Would I benefit from getting completely shedded once in a while? Would it be a nice little holiday from the clear-headed reality-facing that I do every day?

It's like the whole religion thing. Would I be happier if I could abdicate my responsibilities to some (probably imaginary) guy in the sky?

Would it be easier to trust in God to have his plan for me, and to take care of me, rather than having to make all my own decisions and worry that they are the right ones?

Maybe so, but that's even more unlikely than that I'll take to drink! I find Gin more of a possibility than ever coming to believe in a God.

Particularly one who has a plan, and who is taking care of people down here on earth - the evidence all screams that that's not happening.

That said, I think my facing up to things goes too far. I'm so keen to face up to the negatives in life, that I finish up facing a lot of stuff that doesn't need facing.

My mind runs along the "worst case scenario" route, and I feel I have to face all kinds of unlikely possibilities, that will most likely never happen.

Plus I face the horrible realities that other people face. I've never been one of those "it'll never happen to me" types. Something horrible happens to someone else - disease, crime, piano falling on the head, etc - and I'm convinced that will happen to me.

I should probably just have a drink...